This flash, i bought years ago. Recently got it out again. Such a good buy.

Im not allowed to say i miss you.

But i do, so i posted it here, so no-one would really know... but so you know that i do.

The The hypnagorgic state.

The hypnagorgic state Is ‘the point before immediately falling asleep’.

1950's Editorial

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Some work I did recently for a fashion student :)

Lamps.

So, so far in my project i have been investigating the absurdity within fashion. So, I began by removing a visual identity of fashion, removing the glamour, well, of what we would imagine glamour to be like, and glamorising the everyday.

The uncanny resemblance to a fashion image, but, yet does not look like a fashion image. The removal of the glamorous idol, being replaced by a mundane everyday objects such as, in this case, a lampshade.

The comedy within the images establishes a feeling of mockery towards the fashion industry. Surely if we are wearing the clothes, they are, or were once, fashionable. For instance, joggers are fashionable to runners. An evening dress of a ridiculous cost would be fashionable to celebrities. As normal individuals, it is glamorous to feel comfortable. The positions the models are in are, as I would describe, between a pose. They are neither posed or un-posed. They are at a point of movement, a natural one, and the images is capturing this movement which is there as a relation to the everyday.

Preliminary new Shoot.

This was the first shoot of this series, there are obviously faults and things wrong with the images which over the course of the imagemaking they will be fixed.

This is an image I feel is quite successful. The idea behind this - Fashion is an absurd way of expression. The way someone dresses i a way of describing their lifestyle. Over the corse of this project I want to experiment with this idea of the absurd and create images based on this first preliminary shoot.

Reading about Rankin.

"Photographs are a fabrication. All the hair and make-up and styling is a kind of fantasy in how the photographer sees the person. We create scenarios and use lighting, backgrounds and retouching to create an image that is heightened. It's not inherently real. But then, what you are looking for in photographs is something within it that tells you something about the person. That's obviously a subjective viewpoint. I guess it's quite arrogant of me to think my subjective viewpoint is reality, but if I see something that's not particularly attractive, I don't try to pull away from that." - Rankin

I live this idea that fashion photographs are a lie and they are just an interpretation recorded as a photograph.

The moment...

I think, after watching skins, the moment where you tell someone you love them... and the period where you wait for the reply... is the scariest moment ever.

Not knowing if that person will reply with the right answer. I think for me, i worry way to much, if i am to tell someone I love them, i hope for the answer 'I love you' back.

I think from experience, i have told one or 2 people that I love them, and from my heart have genuinely meant it. The time taken between saying I love you back was too long, this is why I am single now.

If I could tell a person I love them. The next time. It will be perfect. I want someone to feel the incredible emotion in which is held on you when you physically love someone. I miss this moment, I miss this feeling.

I'd love to tell someone I love them, that they mean the world to me, and nothing compares.

One day. I will.

This morning, I woke up next to my best friend.

This morning, I woke up next to my best friend. Not my lover. My best friend.

I'd like to apologize for my behavior the last few days/week. I feel like I have been lost in a world. And like someone this morning quite rightly pointed out. Even writing it on here wont fix the issue. But to be honest. This is a way of expressing the way i feel, kind of like a diary. I like the idea that people can see my train of thought, or see a little bit of themselves in my writing.

Today - I still feel lost. The hope of recovering from a feeling of loneliness and abandonment is still not here. IT will return soon and I will be back as happy as larry. To be honest, i guess im kind of selfish, my problems aren't big problems - people are dying - I am still living, but i dont know what this feeling is. It is in my hope - that I will find the cause of the issue and resolve it using feelings and writing.

This morning I even thought about painting. The way you can paint - draw a shape onto a canvas or material. The idea of self expression. When I was younger, when I was ill, i'd have this strange kind of vision... two grey squares and a dark rectangle. The two squares were inside one another, and then the dark rectangle acted like a door. The outside square was a light grey colour and the square inside that one was a darker grey. Whilst these boxes were infront of my face a force of a feeling of falling, everlasting, like a nightmare. This is some kind of expressionist artwork - isnt it?

Anyway, today I woke up next to my best friend, not my lover, my best friend.

I felt safe, I was still scared, but I knew I was safe. I want to apologize for my behavior last night. I do love you, You know I do.

New book project experiment. Preliminary shoot photographing a few different plastic bottles which I remember from childhood.

Right now - I feel like the world is falling down onto my head.

Today I feel like the world is feeling down. Around me there are lots of different people each with their own life. Each person has their own feeling. You see people who feel as happy and content as can be. You see people who live their lived day by day, each day holding a new challenge, but letting nothing hold them back or phase them.

I think the world is a mad mad place. The people in it with so many ideas. I want to be one of those people who is content with where they are. Im sick of feeling selfish and sick of feeling guilty for the feelings I have.

The world around me is falling appart. I feel around me that my friends could be actors - like the truman show. How do I know that my life is not just one massive story, in which people are looking in and seeing my up days and my down days. How do I know that what I am feeling right now is right? How do I know whats right and wrong, if i feel like im the only person who feels this way.

I'm feeling scared of my life, that im so out of control of my feelings and my actions. Im scared of who I may become, or who I may not become. I really want to achieve in my life, I dont want to be held back. But how can I when I dont even know if this is what my life should be, I mean, I am who I am but what if who I am is just a fake, the feelings I feel are just my imagination and some crude and cruel way of being shown how to understand something.

I feel like im ranting, and that none of this makes sense but i think that maybe by writing this down, someone somewhere wont think im crazy, wont think im a joke. I feel alone in this world, I know i'm not, but I feel like I am. Theres no-one I can trust. As soon as trust someone they backstab or ruin it.

I feel like I'm alone in this world. I feel as if im in this bubble and no-one knows how I feel. I feel like a mess, I feel alone, I feel I cant trust, I feel as if the world is falling appart over and onto my head, and I REALLY don't know what to do about it.

The Timmy Self Portrait.

This is the 'Timmy Self portrait'. Everytime I go out, I see my friends with a camera, this allows me to document my face that night with one singular image. With the assistance of facebook I am tagged allowing an archive of my face to be created. Although this is not an image of my face changing every night, it is a document of probably at least once a week. Some of the images I am fully intoxicated and some I am sober. This is me, this is what I do.

New Shoot, Experimenting with a new medium. This is two examples... Both dresses were created around and on the model. One made with Tin Foil and the other made with Cling film. This was just the preliminary shoot but i really like the aesthetics of the materials used and wish to experiment more with this idea.

My Best Friend.

This is Fiona. She is my best friend. If she wasn't in my life, my life would be so boring. I love the way we have never felt uncomfortable around one-another and the fact that we know each other inside out. I care about who she is, and I respect how she is. She is amazing, and I wanted everyone to know this. Fiona - to date - is the only person that i feel truly myself around. I can do say and be who I am and know im not going to be judged. She is the only person - to date - that i have been able to go for dinner with... and not feel like im going to be rubbish at holding an interesting conversation or worry about making a prat of myself.

Last night, was a crazy night. We went out into town and got fairly intoxicated as it was the end of our Contemporary Technologies project. We had a nice little dance in town which was assisted by a fair amount of shots.

We got home, and had a discussion about what we'd do without each other. We decided, we didn't want to think about it. Its not worth thinking about.

Your my best friend, and I want the whole world to know how amazing you are. :)

“A guy and a girl can be just friends, but at one point or another, they will fall for each other...Maybe temporarily, maybe at the wrong time, maybe too late, or maybe forever” DMB

This was my Final major project at the end of college in 2009. It was a project in which I wanted to represent the personalities of the households in which the corners came from. Top left is my old Flat, Top right is my home bedroom, Bottom left is my friend Ollie's room and the bottom right is my hallway at my parents house. I felt you could tell alot from the corner of a room, how dirty it was, what was on the wall, even if all you could see is the corner of a picture hanging on the wall. Whether thought had gone into the way in which the wall and the ceiling blended. All of this put together made me produce this series of images. I feel i need to revisit it in the future, but as I found them recently I thought I should share them with the world.

My Friends

These are my friends. Matt, Amy and Jack. We ate pizza tonight and we had some fun. I wanted to try out my new lens (Sigma 50mm f1.4) and love it. The Bokeh of the images are immaculate so neet and really nice. I'm going to start doing some more documentary work and portraits I think...

Just stole this, seems like a series of interesting Questions.

Day 01 - Your current relationship, if single discuss how single life is.

Day 02 - Where you’d like to be in 10 years.

Day 03 - Your views on drugs and alcohol.

Day 04 - Your views on religion.

Day 05 - A time you thought about ending your own life.

Day 06 - A photo of yourself and write 30 interesting facts about yourself.

Day 07 - Your zodiac sign and if you think it fits your personality.

Day 08 - A moment you felt the most satisfied with your life.

Day 09 - How you hope your future will be like.

Day 10 – Someone who came into your life unexpected and made an impact.

Day 11 - Put your ipod on shuffle and write 10 songs that pop up.

Day 12 - Bullet your whole day.

Day 13 - Somewhere you’d like to move or visit.

Day 14 – A photo of a cherished memory.

Day 15 - 5 people in your life right now who mean the most.

Day 16 - Your views on mainstream music.

Day 17 - Your highs and lows of this past year.

Day 18 – Something that makes you laugh.

Day 19 - Disrespecting your parents.

Day 20 - How important you think education is.

Day 21 - One of your favorite shows.

Day 22 – Something you want to do before you die.

Day 23 - Give pictures of 5 guys who are famous who you find attractive.

Day 24 – Somewhere you would like to travel.

Day 25 – A photo you took.

Day 26 - What kind of person attracts you.

Day 27 - A problem that you have had.

Day 28 - Something that you miss.

Day 29 - Goals for the next 30 days.

Day 30 - Your highs and lows of this month.

So, this is me, and this was shot on my new lens today. I'm attempting to do my uni work, but i cant seem to get into it. This is a visual source to see how im feeling. Its a true representation of me at this moment.

My New Blog.

I've decided to start using Blogger to write a more sophisticated blog. Follow Me.....